I believe that there are signs all around us that help lead us down the path we should go down and away from ones we shouldn’t. If it’s the right path, then things will flow relatively smoothly. They don’t have to be perfect, but there also won’t be any major road blocks.
There are things in my life that I want more desperately than I have ever wanted in my life. Children, for example, but I know that now is not the right time. I’ve been going over and over our finances to find out when we’ll be able to start having children, and it’s looking like two years from now, if we’re honest with ourselves.
But in that time frame, we should be nearly debt free (minus Erin’s school loans), and we’ll have a household income of 100K just about, which will really be helpful for children.
We could also be living pretty much anywhere in the world. Erin’s career path is so high in demand that there are companies that will pay her to move her and her family to where ever and then pay her 100-120k a year to work for a year or however long. I am so excited for her to get out of school. Financially, we’ll be better off, not that we hurt for money now… We just have a pretty strict budget. And we’ll have more time together.
I know we’re on the right path. We’re getting married in just 76 days! Our ceremony is written and the ceremony music is picked out. And minus a few starting bumps with my mom, we have had a really smooth and drama free experience.
My parents offered to pay for our wedding. We weren’t expecting them too, but they offered. And they’ve paid for everything, including Erin’s dress. They’re also paying for our honeymoon as a wedding present. Erin and I have no idea how to repay them. We’ve been toying with different ideas, but there’s no telling what we’ll come up with.
The point is, my parents came to us. This door down the path of my marriage was flung so wide open that there is no doubt that this is the way I’m supposed to go.
As I was finishing up our ceremony today, I started getting all teary eyed thinking about our future. I know it’s not time for us to have kids yet. Not because of us but because of money. We are going the safest legal route possible for kids: doctors and sperm banks. We don’t want to run the risk of a donor coming back years later and fighting for parental rights since SC honors and protects fathers just like they do mothers.
Both my aunts are throwing us parties. My mom’s sister is throwing a bridal party luncheon the morning of the wedding for both of us, and my dad’s sister is throwing us a bridal shower. So many doors. Such a clear path.
Babies? Unfortunately, they’re going to have to wait. But by the time we start, we’ll have been together and experienced so much that we know it’ll be the perfect time. There’s so much we want to do, so this forced financial delay may be in our benefit. Who knows, maybe by then, SC will allow Erin on the birth certificate simply because we’re married and maybe that’s why we’re being told (spiritually speaking) to wait.
I’m at peace with it. I know we’re strong and on the right path. Our (hopefully four, maybe twins) children will come when it’s time.