Reflections on a Year Gone By
Today is Day Two.
So much happened last year, and as much as some of it sucked, I am thankful for every moment of it. Each event has taught me and caused me to grow in unbelievable ways.
It was this time last year that I made Resolutions that I figured would be easy, but the best laid plans of mice and men often go awry. I was consumed with work responsibilities that I had never had before. I was working multiple hours with students medically unable to come to school, teaching them not only math and science, but also english, history, psychology, and personal finance.
We decided to open our home in adoption, which fell through. That’s a loss I wish on no one, but at the same time, I’m grateful not to be attached to the birth mother for the rest of my life. That situation made Erin and I realize that we wanted to have children, desperately. I got another job to help cover the costs of childcare, but when the adoption fell through, I kept it to help pay off the debt an old flame helped me into.
Then, we tried for our own child, and this is when I was finally, officially diagnosed with a “mild” case of PCOS, if there is such a thing. I was given medicine and my fertility cycle was closely monitored. We purchased donor sperm through a bank for legal reasons (we didn’t want the chance of a donor trying to assert himself in our child’s life later and we didn’t want to spend thousands of dollars to get a lawyer to write up all the paperwork), and we had the IUI done.
Then, during our two week wait, marriage became legal in SC, and we decided on a courthouse wedding if I was pregnant. If I wasn’t, we’d wait to try again and just focus on the weddings, which was set for November.
I wasn’t pregnant, and as much as I was devastated, I was thankful. Thankful for the opportunity to work on my health and the PCOS, thankful for the opportunity to focus on our wedding, thankful for the opportunity to get out of debt before bringing a baby into the mix.
When we started to focus on the wedding, we realized that November wouldn’t work well with my sister, who lives in Japan, so moved out date up, to June.
I’ve had a lot of loss this year.
But I’ve also gained so much.
Erin continues to succeed in graduate school. She starts the next phase of her learning in two to three weeks. She was promoted, which not only puts her into a more supervisor-like role, it also gave her a substantial pay raise. Her job also started to offer her free health insurance, so she’s saving quite a bit of money and has recently paid off two medical bills in full. HOORAY!
With her financial successes come my own, and while I still have debt to pay down, there is now a light at the end of the tunnel, and I have no doubt that I will be 50% if not 100% debt free by the end of the year, without my other job.
Our wedding planning is coming along. I created a wedding website on the knot for our guests, we booked our venue, photographer, DJ, and stylist. Our florist is picked out, but not booked and we’re looking at cakes, bridesmaids dresses, and honeymoons.
We found a wonderful home church that has challenged us to grow in our faith and introduced us to so many wonderful people. They’ve allowed us to find a place of service, where we can feel a part of something greater than ourselves. I’ve been given great opportunities to teach my faith to others in a four-week course, and Erin and I are becoming small group leaders. Our minister has agreed to officiate our wedding, and we are beyond excited by this.
I am immeasurably happy. While this year was hard on us both, we have gained so much more. The Gods have blessed us this year, and we pray they continue to bless us in 2015.